Starcraft II: Starcrap.

Everyone who knows even a little about video games knows Starcraft. Everyone who knows about Starcraft should sure as hell know there's a sequel coming out at some point (never know with Blizzard). However, we find out some more thanks to TGS and BlizzCon.

Lets start with the positive first. Two new gameplay videos showing Terran vs Protoss, and Terran vs Zerg (damn they like to beat up the Terran a lot) action.

Zerg vs Terran:



Protoss vs Terran:



Well that's the good news, getting to see the 3 races in action some more. Now for the bad news. Apparently the campaign for each team is large enough that its going to be a trilogy. What that means is its going to be a lot like Age of Empires III, how it had: AoE III, AoE III: the Asian Dynasties, and AoE III: Warchiefs. So look forward to buying 3 copies of Starcraft II if you want to play the Zerg campaign, Prottos campaign, and the Terran campaign. Yay for spending $40, $40 and $40. However, I don't think this effects multiplayer. With one game (I think) you'll be able to play as all 3 in multiplayer battles.

More Reading: [here] and [here]

Cosplay Magic... becuase it really is.

Well with both TGS and Blizzcon going on at the same time there is a whole lot of video game news pouring in. However before all that, lets just take a step back and admire some pretty women, and fantastic costumes (sometimes both).

Best of Blizzcon/TGS pictures: [Here] (note: these are just the best of what I've seen flying around the web, I haven't taken any)

They kind of make you sit there and wonder: what the hell does North America (not counting blizzcon) do wrong? Our cosplays are never anywhere close to the quality of those.

As a side note, while talking about costumes. More boothbabes!

Thats the Temco's booth companions. Skimpy clothing, and hot women. I'm pretty sure I have a new favorite company.

Thats SK Playmore's booth companions. Mia, Mia, Mia, Mia, and don't forget Mia.

Resident can't come fast enough Evil 5

New Resident Evil 5 trailer straight from TGS (Tokyo Game Show).



We all know that they just do this to taunt us. The video clearly shows: Wesker is being a bastard again (fuck doesn't that bastard just give up?), once again not zombies, Black People, a angry dude with a chainsaw (fuck! not again!), clear reference to the Leon incident, and most importantly: Your co-woman isn't all that sexy, give me Ada Wong or Ashley any day.

Dead Rising: Suck Till You Drop From The Sheer Crappyness Of The Game.

I'm one of the people that hear "Dead Rising" and get excited in all the right places. However, then someone goes and adds ": Chop Till You Drop" and I hurl.

Dead Rising for the Wii should be more aptly named "Sorry man, most of the zombies we're killed the first time we were here... 2 years ago... on the 360". The way I see it, so many people got the Zombie Genocider achievement, and that makes up for the extreme lack of zombies in the Wii version. The most tallied so far on the screen at once was 6 zombies. The whole fun of zombies is the massive amount in which they swarm you... well... no swarming here. However to compensate (... if you want to call it that) they have added in demon zombie poodles and parrots. Yeah... BECAUSE that compensates for them being 53, 588 zombies short. What makes it worse is that the zombies are still slow, so to avoid them its going to take about as much effort as killing carlito with the megaman blaster. However, apparently in the Japanese version they were able to get 10! at once, and at TGS (Tokyo Game Show) there was the final version, which had 30 at max.

The lack of zombies isn't the only problem. The controls are another pretty big one. They are sketchy, awkward, and downright poorly layed out. For instance, to pick up an item you have to hit both the [Z] and the [A] button.

Most of this information is from the Tokyo game show, where the game was played by quite a few people, who all said it was "Dead Rising: Chop Till... fuck it this game makes me sad".

More Reading: [here and here and screenshots]

Diablo III: Becuase who didn't see it coming.

Well the Tokyo Game Show is still going on, and a whole lot of information is still pouring out of it. Newly released is a whole bunch of Diablo III news.

So far there are 3 new classes: The Witchdoctor, the Barbarian, and the newly announced Wizard. The Wizard is the newest edition and (if no new classes come) the "big surprise". So it's pretty obvious that there is going to be the most information about them.

Blizzard wizard trailer:



Gameplay video:



Wizard's current (subject to change) talent tree: [here]

More Reading: [here]

Screenshots: [here]

Fallout 3 won't feel good on my desktop....

The System requirements for Fallout 3 are:

Minimum System Requirements:

• Windows XP/Vista
• 1GB System RAM (XP)/ 2GB System RAM (Vista)
• 2.4 Ghz Intel Pentium 4 or equivalent processor
• Direct X 9.0c compliant video card with 256MB RAM (NVIDIA 6800 or better/ATI X850 or better)

Recommended System Requirements:

• Intel Core 2 Duo processor
• 2 GB System RAM
• Direct X 9.0c compliant video card with 512MB RAM (NVIDIA 8800 series, ATI 3800 series)
• Supported Video Card Chipsets:
  
  
  • NVIDIA GeForce 200 series
  • NVIDIA Geforce 9800 series
  • NVIDIA Geforce 9600 series
  • NVIDIA Geforce 8800 series
  • NVIDIA Geforce 8600 series
  • NVIDIA Geforce 8500 series
  • NVIDIA Geforce 8400 series
  • NVIDIA Geforce 7900 series
  • NVIDIA Geforce 7800 series
  • NVIDIA Geforce 7600 series
  • NVIDIA Geforce 7300 series
  • NVIDIA GeForce 6800 series
  • ATI HD 4800 series
  • ATI HD 4600 series
  • ATI HD 3800 series
  • ATI HD 3600 series
  • ATI HD 3400 series
  • ATI HD 2900 series
  • ATI HD 2600 series
  • ATI HD 2400 series
  • ATI X1900 series
  • ATI X1800 series
  • ATI X1600 series
  • ATI X1300 series
  • ATI X850 series

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More Fallout 3 related news: The 360 version has already been leaked and is downloading to modded 360s. This is a very uncool thing to do. This means that its going to make companies look at consoles and go "we need some form of protection against piracy here too" and we'll get some annoying anti-piracy thing. Computer games are one thing (I generally tend to have a strict "no new games policy [voided by spore, because well.... the DRM pissed me off]). Not only that but Bethesda deserves the money. They went and made one kick ass looking game, and now its going to be pirated up the wazoo. They spent something like four years making this and they're already losing money, and that game is still 20 days from launch.

Pirates you are unclassy indeed today (yeah, that's right, I'm not associating myself with these guys, at least I buy a game if its gonna be really good, and I always exclude consoles from my actions).

Update: More info [here].

Halo Again! surprised?

As anyone who browses the Internet knows there are a lot of stupid assholes that are obsessed with Halo 3 (that's a different point) there has been a lot of rumors about Bungie working on another Halo game (not being Halo Wars). Well it was just announced that its not quite a game, its an expansion. To be more specific it is a prologue to Halo 3. However you do not play as Master Chief, you play as an ODST (Orbital Drop Shock Trooper). It's pretty exciting to experience the Halo Universe without Master Chief, but as the UNSC's special ops troopers (that's right, a pretty normal person). However I know there is going to be a lot of protest about this, every one will want to be the Chief.

There's a trailer for the game (below) as well. Its not too detailed, it just shows off the graphics, and the character you will be playing as. Also that it's set to come out "Fall 2009". Personally I think the ODST you will be playing as looks much cooler then Master Chief.

Along with the game it will add more multiplayer maps to Halo 3.



More in Halo News: Halo Wars (the RTS). There was a third team announced: The Flood. However this team will not be playable. The flood is just a single-player enemy only. Which still means there are only 2 races to play multiplayer as.

update: [more reading here]

Halo and Metroid action!

A while (being "greater then a year") there was a video made called "Haloid". It was made by a fellow named Monty Oum and its about a 10 minute video. This man did the whole thing by himself. That means the sound effects, animation (even the characters, he didn't use any templates, they're all his), and story. It goes: OSDT vs the Covenant, Spartan vs Covenant, Spartan vs Samus, Samus and Spartan vs Covenant, Samus and Spartan being in love.



Originally when Monty Oum made this it was a 10 and a bit minute video, composed of 2 'chapters'. For some reason people have decided to separate, and in most cases cut out (and not make reference to) this second part. I included this second part below (its a good time, and just damn sexy)



By now you have probably said: "Master Chief isn't a woman, this is gay!" or "Master chief could totally beat Samus" or "Master Chief isn't in this video, what the fuck?!" or "fap, fap, fap, fap, fap, fap" or "This is the coolest thing ever, Monty Oum is my hero!". There are several things wrong with most of those comments. (1) Master Chief isn't T3H 1337 shit. (2) Samus is about 5000 years (estimate) more advanced then Master Chief (Master Chief is from the 26th century). (3) No, master chief isn't in the video, it's just a random spartan who happens to be female, its possible its Nichole from DoA4. (4) Yeah... there are sexual innuendos, and there are totally a lesbian-ness going on. Yes Samus is EXTREMELY HOT, and the MasterChick is also pretty hot. And yes, that dance is extremely sexy... but avoid masturbating to it... just watch it a lot.... (5) This is definitely amazing.

If you were wondering: Lesbians rock, and the reason for Monty Oum ending it as he did was so that there WASN'T a victor. If he had had it play out to the end, with one winning (and no team up and lesbian-ness) it wouldn't have been any fun he would have got huge amount of angry emails about it. This way we all had fun (except the halo fans and who cares about them) and Monty Oum doesn't get nearly as many emails as he would have.

This video happens to be widely detested by a lot of the Halo 3 fanfags idiots fans. In fact there is one with an 'alternate ending' that at one point had more youtube views then the original video did (everyone who liked it saw it through different sites anyway, for the most part that is). The info on the 'alternate ending' video is: "I changed the ending, because we All know The Master Chief is not only a man or the main character, but the "Last" Spartan. So enjoy!". As stated before: this person is a complete idiot. Also his 'alternate ending' [found here] is just the full video, being cut off right after they fly away from the explosion. Also: note the bastard asshole bum-nibbler person didn't give any credit to Oum.